So you have just been diagnosed with herpes and are convinced that nobody will ever want to date you again? Well, you are wrong. There are plenty of other people with herpes in the U.S. alone, about one in six people between 14 and 49 years are living with HSV. Feel better yet? Here is something more; you can learn to date again. These steps will show you how. Don’t rush yourself back into the dating world. You want to think your situation through and give yourself time to get comfortable with the fact that herpes is now part of your life.
Don’t rush yourself back into the dating world. You want to think your situation through and give yourself time to get comfortable with the fact that herpes is now part of your life. Once you are comfortable with it, you can go forth into the world and find love again.
How do you tell someone, on your first date, that you have herpes? It is a conversation that most people cannot picture themselves having, and until you is comfortable having that conversation with someone who doesn't have herpes, then consider not having with someone who does. There are plenty of herpes dating sites online that will connect you to other HSV singles; you just have to reach out.
Only use trusted herpes dating sites, and if you meet someone, you can still have a conversation about how and when each of you got the disease. It helps to learn the experiences of other people with herpes.
Although it would have been ideal to tell your partner that you have herpes before you had sex with them, some circumstances are inevitable. If it happens that you two have sexual relations before you drop the herpes bomb, and then still inform them so they can get checked. Chances are they will not get the virus after a single exposure.
Put yourself in their shoes; if your date just told you they have herpes, what would you want to know? Tell them all you would have liked to be told, including the risk of them contracting the disease if you two end up having sex. With meds and condoms, however, the risk of transmitting herpes sexually, although still present, is lower than it was before.
Rejection is easy to understand, but what if your partner is confused or uncertain? Give them a chance to speak and ask questions, and when they do, have an honest conversation with them.
You may be rejected once or twice, and sometimes, your partner will want some space after you tell them. Give them this space and allow them to decide on their own.
You still have the same personality and values. It is a disease like any other, and it can be managed. Research on the condition and join a support group for people with herpes if you have to, but never let the disease take over your dating life to the extent that you forget your worth.
